Hey friends! I did a post a few years back on Mother’s Day and decided I would revamp it. Much of this will be the same as that older post, with a few newer ideas thrown in.
I wanted to start by sharing a funny Mother’s Day story.
Last year I had the BEST Mother’s Day. And guess what? I didn’t see my kids. Ha! I was in a hotel in Nashville on a work trip with Nate. We slept in. We got breakfast. I drank hot coffee. It was so blissful. I was so content.
This was me on Mother’s Day Morning without my kids 🙂
And what I realized is that what I received on Mother’s Day is what so many desperately want: a BREAK.
Mother’s Day can be hard for that reason. In years past all I really wanted was a break, but there was a weird guilt that came in asking for a break from my kids on the day my kids are celebrating me. I’m the MOM after all; I put the “Mother” in Mother’s Day. It felt like having a birthday party thrown for you and then choosing not to attend.
This day is going to change a lot over the next ten years. Now that the older two are in full-day school (and wipe their own bottoms), I can already feel it shifting. The clawing desire to get away has subsided (for the most part!). There will likely come a day when they are old enough to think for this day and I absolutely love it. There will also likely come a day when I long to have my kids close by and they aren’t around. It will also be much harder once my own mom is gone (Lord willing, many many years from now). All that to say, the best is yet to come and the best is also right here right now. Life is beautiful and so very complex in that way.
I don’t think this post will address all the many feelings that Mother’s Day can bring up for each individual, but I do hope some of the words below help you to manage your expectations, whatever they may be.
To those who have lost a child, a mother, or are in a season of longing to be a mother, in the adoption process, my heart aches for you. I have not experienced any of the above things, but I know that if I had, I think more than anything I would want to be seen. I would want to know that people love me and are praying for me. That I am not forgotten. And so, I will be praying for you as Mother’s Day approaches. I will be praying that you know that Jesus sees you, and He hears your cries. I will be praying that He fills your heart with “peace that surpasses understanding” and fills the void you feel this Mother’s Day. You are a rare warrior group of women in my mind. You are weathering one of the hardest storms life can throw at you. I will be praying that as the seas feel tumultuous and you feel scared, angry, and alone, that you would believe that Jesus is in the boat with you. But, not only is He in the boat, He is captain of the ship and controller of the entire sea. He is mighty. And He is good. And He loves you deeply and can enter in where the wounds feel so incredibly tender. I pray that people who know you show up in unexpected ways that remind you that you are deeply loved.
For anyone searching for God in the mourning or waiting, this song could be a comfort: Drawn to You, Audrey Assad
I would also like to add a final note for single mothers. This particular group are such heroes, and can easily be overlooked on days like Mother’s Day, especially if their children are not old enough to know that such a day exists. As you think about the way you would love for your own spouse/children to love on you this Mother’s Day, consider what ways you could let any single mothers in your life know what they are seen and appreciated. A simple card, or flowers, or a gift card for a pedicure could be a balm to their soul this Mother’s Day.
Here’s something amazing: when I start my own mother’s day expectations by focusing on the above groups of women, it automatically catapults me into gratitude for my own circumstances. And guess what really helps me have an amazing Mothers Day? Gratitude.
Now, to those of you who are mothers joyfully anticipating “their special day,” the truth is, Mother’s Day is about us, but it also isn’t about us. In theory, that fact that we have these little children to call us Mom is a gift enough and reason enough to be joyful and praise God. It is a day we get to simply sit in the blessing that the Lord allowed you to be a mother/have a mother. But I totally get it. You wipe butts all day and make countless meals and you just want this ONE DAY for someone to appreciate you and pamper you like Beyonce.
Those are just a few ideas (if you have a good one leave it in the comments!). I would love to give a special shout out to “the Ninnies” (love you ladies!) for their amazing help with ideas for this post! Y’all are the best sounding board and Naptime Kitchen wouldn’t be what it is without you.